Some of you might think the next subject’s a little racy, other may find it a unique way to actually help a marriage. We’re talking about swingers.
Swinging is a lifestyle where you share your partner with other couples. But one thing swingers don’t share is the traditional view of marriage.
It’s like inside any home in Central PA, and the couple we interviewed is like most couples…But they’re not just any husband and wife- they’re swingers.
They say, “I can tell him anything, what I like, what I don’t like, who I like and that’s fine…It’s exciting to us, we go home and have better sex.”
The husband and wife met 9 years ago after their divorces. They started swinging when their friends encouraged them to attend clubs specially designed for those who want to have sex with other couples. Those clubs are right here in Central PA.
They say it, “brings us together each time we go out. Every time we do something, it’s like we come home and I always come home to him, no matter who I may see or who I may find attractive, he’s my number 1.”
They say swinging, also known as the Lifestyle or LS is a sexy and educational experience.
“I can watch somebody, oh there’s a new trick I didn’t know. Then I can go home and practice it. So I get to try new tips without having to read a book, see a movie, it’s live and that in itself is sexual tension, sexual energy.”
Another couple who’s been married since October of last year agrees.
They say, “Most adults have seen porn or have watched porn of any kind. When you go to a club like that, depending on how it’s set up, if there’s someone doing that, it’s like you’re watching a live pron. So for a couple who might not do anything, it still sparks that interest, gets your labedo going and worked up.”
There’s more to the lifestyle than meeting people at clubs. Holli and Michael of Playboy TV are known around the world for their radio and television shows that focus on swinging.
They say, “What draws people to us is the honesty. We share the good and the bad, we don’t hide that we’re parents.”
The duo says swinging can help your marriage.
“We talk a lot about the TTLC- trust, talk, listen and communicate. Monotony is good as long as it doesn’t become monotonous. It works because when you trust each other, you’ll talk. When you talk, you listen because of the trust and then you’ll communicate.”
Andreya Jones is a licensed social worker who specializes in sex therapy. She works with several couples who swing. She says the Lifestyle works for most couples.
Jones says, “With couples who know who they are and individually and as a couple, and have that before they swing, then they are fine.”
Jones’s clients are your everyday people. They could even be your friends and neighbors.
Jones says, “teachers, they’re social workers, police, they’re just exploring their sexuality in a different way. But in a way that isn’t going behind their significant other’s back.”
Swingers say the Lifestyle isn’t right for everyone but it’s available to anyone. The Internet serves as a social networking tool for swingers to meet. More common in bigger cities like Los Angeles, here in Central Pennsylvania the lifestyle’s still Taboo.”
One couple says, “You’re in a very conservative area. Until there’s a little more around here it will take another 20 to 30 years before they’re comfortable with the idea.”
Until then, these couples’ lifestyles remain private.
Another couple says, “It’s the fear of judgement, the fear of how they’re going to react.”
Within the swinger community, they look to one another for support.
“It’s just a very close-knit family style group of people who are open and they’ll back you up.” “That’s why we do it. So why bother worrying about the world when eventually will catch up. In the meantime, we live our life and enjoy it.”
There are rules that many couple follow, such as the pretty woman rule. This means couples can’t engage in kissing with others for fear of falling in love. Swingers say rules can be amended as needed.