YORK, Pa. — Between play dates, errands and work, you probably wouldn't expect busy parents to feel lonely, right?
However, many people find the chaos and endless responsibilities of parenting very isolating. A new survey reveals just how deeply loneliness affects parents across the country.
Anne Helms can barely find a moment to talk about how busy she is as a working mom of two.
"My guess is that other parents will feel that way," she said.
Although Helms is in constant contact with others, she finds parenting can be very lonely in an increasingly remote world.
"I'm Zoom calling people very often," Helms said. "However, you don't get the small talk. You miss a lot of those small interactions that you'd have in the hallway. Just a lot more of that personal touch has been eliminated, and in many regards, it's just never been infiltrated back into our society."
Kate Gawlik is a nurse practitioner and health and wellness researcher at The Ohio State College of Nursing — as well as a mom of four. She says parental loneliness and burnout are closely intertwined.
A new national survey by the Ohio State University Wexner Medical Center finds about two-thirds of parents sometimes or frequently find the demands of parenthood isolating and feel lonely and burned out by their responsibilities as a parent.
"That feeling of connection that somebody else is dealing with what you are dealing with can be so powerful when it comes to combating feelings of loneliness," said Gawlik.
She leads a positive parenting program where parents can speak openly about the challenges they face. It's also where Helms realized she wasn't alone.
"I think that the ripple effect from connecting with other parents and getting support when you need is immeasurable," Helms said. "It makes you a better employee. It makes you a better spouse, parent, friend."
That mutual support, Helms says, is easy to find if you just let your guard down.
"I make time to say, 'Hello. Hey, my son talks about your child. You should definitely set up a play date--here's my number,' and just put myself out there to make that connection," she said.
The survey found four out of five parents would value a way to connect with others outside of work and home, so chances are the parent standing next to you at your child's activity needs support just as much as you do. If you don't know where to start, experts say search for parent groups and meetups in your area on social media. Many community centers and large employers also offer programs and groups just for parents.